October 2, 2026
Have you ever noticed how just a small change can make a big difference? Recently we changed out the light over our kitchen table. I used the term “we” because I picked the light out and my husband hung it. I think that qualifies as a “we.”
Anyway, the new light made such a big difference. It’s not that it sheds more light or that it was expensive or flashy. It just changes the perspective of how the room looks. It “reframes” the look of my kitchen.
One of the definitions of reframe is to look at, present, or think of something in a new or different way. I have been pondering the word reframe and God brought to mind some situations in my life that He has reframed for me. To be honest with you, I have struggled recently with the changes that the “teenage years” have brought to my granddaughters.
I remember my friends who had older grandchildren telling me that the relationship with your grandchildren changes as they get older. When they are younger, as grandparents, you are the ones they love to go and see and they look forward to being with you. In their eyes, you can do no wrong. As they get older, their lives change.
They are involved in all sorts of extra-curricular activities and they have friends, which means they spend a vast amount of time on the phone and socializing. They still love their grandparents, but your role changes. YOU become the ones who look forward to spending time with THEM. You are so proud of their accomplishments and just want to be involved and included in their lives. If I remember correctly, it actually happens as parents with your children too.
This has been hard for me. I had to “reframe” my thinking. Instead of seeing this as a negative that I could allow to hurt my feelings, I have had to see it as a process and stage. I know they love me. I know they will have fond memories. I pray they know how much I love them. I have to reframe my thoughts.
They are still my grandchildren. I just have a different role. It shouldn’t hurt my feelings. It should allow me to be grateful and appreciative of the years I had to be an integral part of their early development. It also makes me thankful that as grandparents we have the opportunity to see them excel and mature in the manner in which they should as they grow up. I still love them and they still love me. God had to “reframe” my mind to look at the situation differently.
Another area that I struggled with was all the years leading up to our daughter Missie’s diagnosis. At a young age she was diagnosed with developmental delays, and behavioral and emotional issues due to autism. When she was younger I can remember saying to my friend, “It’s not like you can go next door and ask what did you do when your child was struggling with these issues?” because my friends weren’t dealing with the same kinds of issues.
Autism can be a lonely road to walk. There were times when I felt as though we were just creating a path the best way we could to help Missie, and us for that matter, just survive. I didn’t understand and honestly, there were times I was angry at God.
Over the years as I matured in my faith, God has “reframed” my attitude and purpose with Missie. He helped me turn the struggles into opportunities. There are so many people in this world with special needs children and some are dealing with way harder situations than I have. I can now see this as an opportunity that God has given me to have an understanding of hurt, confusion, frustration, caring, and compassion that not everyone may have. He has allowed us to have the opportunity to minister to others who are struggling.
We can’t solve their problems but we can walk alongside them. We can identify with the same feelings they are probably having. Even though I wasn’t able to walk down the road to ask my neighbor's advice when I was struggling, I pray Wayne and I can be that neighbor or friend who can listen, identify, love, and pray for someone who God puts in our path dealing with a special needs child. God “reframed” my helplessness into hope.
I think about my mother-in-law. For years she was the caregiver for her husband as he had Alzheimer’s. She cared for him in their home until it became necessary to move him to a nursing home. At the nursing home, she would arrive before breakfast and stay until after dinner. She fed him every meal and cared for all his needs. I am sure there were times when she was exhausted and weary. I know it was a lonely road for her.
Not long after my father-in-law passed away my brother-in-law was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s. My sister-in-law had her mother to minister to her as she walked this road. God “reframed” the entire situation for both of these women. My mother-in-law had first-hand experience to help her daughter walk this hard road and my sister-in-law had her mother who could identify with her every feeling and emotion.
My brother-in-law passed away almost three years ago. Since that time these two precious ladies have moved in together. They both are such beautiful examples of ministering to other people in so many ways. God “reframed” their pain into a purpose to serve others.
I can’t help but think of Romans 8:28 “And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love Him, who have been called according to His purpose.” We can’t control what happens to us, but we can control how we frame it. The challenge is to change your thinking. I want to be able to look and learn how to reframe my perspective based on God’s truth, and not on my situation. What about you?
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Jill Johnson, a staff member at the Georgia Baptist Mission Board, finds spiritual applications in her everyday experiences as a wife, mother, grandmother and Georgian. She is available to speak to your church's women's gatherings. Reach her at jjohnson@gabaptist.org.
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